ahh, So, What's Up Doc?

So, my brother came by two weeks back, and I flip him a couple hundred, to build the "bunny hole", one horizontal piece of wood, with two much smaller in length, side ends, with respective holes, the piece of wood being disposed between a retaining wall and a brick bin, so that therein, it remains cool for the bunnies, with access to the backyard lawn, when they choose, yet provides a safe haven for the bunnies, at night, when the coyotes cruise. Thereafter, I bought 2 bunnies. My boys 3 and 4 just love terrorizing them, but the bunnies need training to get the bunnies to make the fast, exit stage left, into the bunny hole, and SAFE, at night when the coyotes cruise. So, I let the boys "run wild". So, next, my buddy had a bunch of gheney pigs, and gave me five, live bait for the backyard, to test the bunnyhole, and sure enough, within two days, all five gheny pigs were gone, and ONE bunny, as well, which did not learn so quick from the backyard human terrorists. However, the other one "Floppy", a black/white lop, survived a whole week. SUCCESS!!!

That, my friends, is success, "Floppy" is doing just fine, but was now a lone female, so now we have "groovy", a term like "bitchen", "boss", "cool" originating in the mid-late 60s. Groovy, however goes back to the 50s. Initially, Floppy was pisst, territoriality exploded, and she just chased the johniecomelately male gray straight eared bunny, around and around, but seems to have settled down, as they are kissing cousins, now.

The boys are out this day, in the yard, chasing Groovy around the backyard, grabbing, throwing, and just causing the newly arrived, much fear, but, Groovy is learning fast, at the first sound, he make a rocket shot to the bunnyhole, a skill necessary to survive the AM prowling coyotes. So, please my friends, pray Groovy (M)and Floppy (F), that they may survive, and have a long life together, with many little bunnies, who will be sacrificed in part to the coyote gods, in due course. Its only fair and natural, you know, predators have to eat!!!

Before I went to a commercial pet store to buy Groovy, however, I stopped at the local animal shelter to see if I could get some FREEBIES. No way, Jose, they want cash on the barrow for the abandoned bunnies, and they had many of them. The web page said that all family members must be present to acquire "adopt" a pet from the shelter. HHmmmm I thought, that is kinda weird, but ok, we all four went down. But, it aint no acquisition purchase, it is actually, a rigorous, adoption service. NO JOKE!!!

So, I am in a socialistic institutions, (tax funded) looking for bunnies, (those cute little things) and see many of them, the boys crying, I want that one, and that one and that one, etc, kinda like impotent Americans at a Russian orphanage. Apparently, the shelter workers (no doubt hard-core animal rights activists) take a very personal interest of their charges. A short, thin, blonde comes out in her official garb. I said, I would like at least one Male, for Floppy our only female bunny, maybe as many as five bunnies. She starts off with, well, before you buy, you have to bring Floppy in to make sure they get all get along. I said, this aint a dating service, is it? I though, ut-oh, to myself. She then asks, if I live in an apartment, and if so, I will need a copy of the lease agreement to make sure it would be ok to have a pet. I said I live in a house, mine. I thought, hhmmm, a Peta-vile freak, no doubt with a can of fur paint, ready at all times, strapped to the hip, and a sure shot. She then says, that the bunnies must live IN-DOORS. WHAT??? I asked, do they have to have their own room? If they have little ones, do I have to re-paint the nursery? She says, there are predators out there. I said, yeah, I know, and I devised a plan to defeat the coyotes. She goes, there are hawks as well, and if the bunny is in the back yard, the bunnies must be supervised at all times. I said in 20 years, I have seen one hawk on my property. I also have had one gopher shake. She said, you see, the bunnies must remain in doors. I asked, do I have to hire a bunnysitter, when out with the family? She goes, we have our rules. She then asked, now get this, would you like to fill out an application? I said I have a job. She said, you have to fill out an application for review to see if it is permitted for you to have one of our (30 or so) bunnies. I said, I like rabbit, but have no plans on frying my own. Our bunnies are pets, not predator feed. My eyes are rolling!!! They are freaking rabbits!!!! They have been predator feed for 20 million years. On the floor!! My Russian wife was astounded, I thought it funny, and looking back, very predicable. These people are simply NUTS, their minds on their extended family members. Also, even the commercial pet stores have workers deeply concerned about "predator feed", and one even said last year, that they would not sell me anymore bunnies, if the coyotes are still taking them.

But, now there is the boy-bunny game. The boys observe the bunnies from inside the house, and when they see the bunnies in the middle of the yard, the boys open the back door and launch a sprint to the bunnyhole, to put a door at the entrance, a piece of small wood to block the the front hole, Its a RACE, and funnier than heck, actually. If the boys win the race, they then put a brick blocking the back hole entrance, and the bunnies are trapped in the backyard, with no where to escape the terrorists. Its just a matter of time before the bunny stop running, and are caught by the terrorists, after which, papa schools them on loving, petting, and feeding, and that is darling, as well as fun, for me and the boys, but ensures continued ROCKET-SHOT training to the entrance, upon hearing any noise, which is so funny, day after day, continued joy. Coyotes I hope are not so smart to lie and wait, as they must in the first instance, make some noise scaling the fence from the max distance to the bunny hole. So, that is the game, and I hope it works in perpetuity.

Look, surely its cruel to torture an animal, but rodents do not have concepts of self or time or future, and predator feed is exactly what they are, those little procreating bunnies, and I really think its just fine, if coyotes eat bunnies, dont coyotes have any animal rights, or are they simply just shot down as the primary rodent scourge? I think a coyote is a superior being to the rabbit, and should be more protected than freaking rabbits. I only want the boys to have the experience of living with animals, in some regard, and for that reason, built the bunnyhole. She can stick her application up her bunnyhole, as far as I am concerned. Absolutely Ridiculous, at tax payer's expense, so, nothing new there.

Derrick

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Just Cant believe it, remember the 2 squirells, camping out, well, they had a litter of 9, and 11 running around. This day, 4th, I heard loud squeek squeek, could not figure out what it was, wife ran out, then monster chirp chrip, mommy squirell telling babies, hide, it was a HAWK, 2nd I have seen on my property in 20 years, after the initial development cutting trees 20 years hitherto, and the fires of laguna california, the trees are coming back, and so are the critters, that Hawk just sitting there eye balling mommy squirell. I can just see the animal shelter thugs, showing up, with nets or shot guns, to kill/capture a BIRD OF PREY. Predators aint got no rights, they get the CHITS, from the PETA-VILE crowd. A couple of the baby squirells, sticking their heads out of the retaining wall, curiousity will kill these rodents, and guess what, THAT IS OK!!! Its nature, right there, in surberbia. Beautiful thing to see, predator-prey interaction, to see it right there in the back yard. YIKES, wife just called, one sec... It was the HAWK again, right on the fence, then circling the retaining wall, absolutely beautiful bird, the wing structure, the dynamic tail rudder action of close in flight, and curved beek you know that just rips flesh and fur, just stunning to watch the hunt. And that is somehow wrong? These peta-vile freaks need to chill out.

I wish I was a bird of prey, to live free without the IRS thugs on my back to feed the liberal agenda of immoral income redistribution and counter-productive detrimental goverment care for all, to soar high and fast without the traffic cops on my tail, to exchange in honest real gold and silver money so the gov/banks dont enslave or cheat me, to use my land to raise bunnies, as I see fit without the PETA-VILE crowd getting on my case, to worship Jesus openingly without being condemned for beliving in a so called out-moded religion, that promotes sound moral values, to be able to call it like it is, without the SP PC crowd getting their panties in bunch for strong but accurate language, to wear a loaded gun in public to prevent getting robbed in broad day light. I wish I was born free, to live life in real FREEDOM, and not be born imprisoned and constrained by the multitudes of excessive regulations and an excessive number of laws. ON THIS JULY 4th, it is a glad day, but one that brings saddness in many ways, as well. I wish had lived in the early 1800s, to be a free mountian man, the free-est of all, to be a BRIDGER, and on my death bed, only wish to see THEM THAR HILLs, just one more time, and live in GOD's beauty and nature, in the land of the FREE (well kinda) and the Brave (except for the cut-and-run cowards).

Derrick

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